SZN. 4 Ep. 11/ Talking With Clients About the Current State of Our Country
Talking With Clients About the Current State of Our Country
By: Alexandria Gohla, MSW, LCSW, Ed.S, PMH-C
Lately, many of us are hearing some version of the same thing in session:
“I just feel overwhelmed. Angry. Scared. Exhausted. Numb. All of it.”
Across ages, identities, and belief systems, clients are bringing the emotional weight of the current state of our country into the therapy room. For some, it shows up as anxiety or rage. For others, grief, hopelessness, or emotional shutdown. And for many, it’s not one feeling—it’s a constant oscillation between several.
As therapists, our role is not to persuade, debate, or minimize. Our role is to help clients understand their internal experience, regulate their nervous systems, and move toward lives that feel meaningful and sustainable—even in the midst of uncertainty.
Validation Comes First
Before skills. Before reframing. Before action.
Clients need to know their reactions make sense.
We start by validating:
“Given what’s happening, it’s understandable you feel this way.”
“Your nervous system is responding to real stress.”
“You’re not weak for feeling this—you’re human.”
From a DBT lens, this is the acceptance side of the dialectic. Validation reduces shame, lowers defensiveness, and creates the emotional safety necessary for change.
Naming and Normalizing Emotions
Many clients feel unsettled not just because of what’s happening—but because they can’t quite name what they’re feeling.
We slow things down and help clients:
Label emotions (anger, fear, grief, helplessness, disgust, numbness)
Notice mixed emotions without judgment
Understand that emotional intensity and fluctuation are normal during prolonged uncertainty
Emotion labeling is a core emotion regulation skill. When we can name what we feel, we reduce emotional flooding and restore access to Wise Mind.
Assessing Safety When Needed
For some clients, political stress intersects with:
Trauma histories
Marginalized identities
Depression or suicidal ideation
Escalating anger or hopelessness
When emotions feel unmanageable, gentle safety check-ins are appropriate. This isn’t alarmist—it’s responsible care. DBT reminds us that distress tolerance and safety always come before problem-solving.
Recognizing the Universality of This Moment
One powerful reframe is helping clients recognize that their distress is not a personal failure—it’s a collective nervous system response.
We normalize:
Collective grief and fear
Chronic activation from constant exposure to threat-based information
Emotional exhaustion from sustained uncertainty
This shifts clients from “What’s wrong with me?” to “Something hard is happening, and my response is understandable.”
Boundaries: A Cornerstone of Mental Health Right NOW
Boundaries With Others
Many clients feel pressured to engage in political conversations that quickly become invalidating, heated, or harmful—especially with family members.
We explicitly reinforce:
It is okay to disengage from unproductive or triggering discussions
Protecting your mental health is not avoidance—it’s effectiveness
You do not owe anyone access to your emotional energy
From a DBT perspective, this is interpersonal effectiveness. We often practice boundary-setting using DEAR MAN skills and remind clients that disengaging is not “losing”—it’s choosing self-respect.
Boundaries With the Mind
Not all boundaries are external.
We also help clients notice when:
Rumination takes over
Doom-scrolling becomes compulsive
Their mental space is consumed by replaying arguments or imagined futures
Clients are encouraged to gently redirect attention—not through suppression, but through mindful choice.
Media Boundaries and the “Media Diet”
Staying informed does not require constant exposure.
We talk openly about:
Limiting news intake to set times
Avoiding media first thing in the morning or before bed
Fact-checking before emotionally investing
Choosing fewer, more reliable sources
This is framed as Wise Mind decision-making—balancing awareness with nervous system protection.
Grounding and Nervous System Regulation
When clients are dysregulated, we return to the body.
Common DBT-aligned tools include:
5-4-3-2-1 sensory grounding
Paced breathing
Progressive Muscle Relaxation
Temperature shifts (cold water on the face)
Vagal nerve stimulation through humming, singing, or chanting
We often incorporate brief sensory check-ins:
“What do you notice in your body right now?”
“What does your nervous system need in this moment?”
These skills are not avoidance—they are distress tolerance strategies that help clients move out of survival mode and back into Wise Mind.
Cognitive Reframing Without Toxic Positivity
Cognitive work here is not about minimizing reality. It’s about reducing overwhelm.
We help clients:
Differentiate between what they can and cannot control
Gently challenge catastrophic thinking
Anchor attention in the present moment
Tools like the Circles of Control framework are especially helpful, offering a concrete way to redirect energy toward what is actionable rather than consuming.
Making Space for Anger
Anger is showing up strongly right now—and that makes sense.
Anger is often a protective emotion, especially in the face of perceived injustice or threat. Drawing from trauma-informed perspectives such as those of Gabor Maté, we remind clients that anger is not something to eliminate—it’s something to understand.
From a DBT perspective:
Emotions are not the problem
Unexamined emotions often drive ineffective behaviors
We help clients notice where anger lives in the body, what it’s protecting, and how to express it without harming themselves or others.
Agency, Empowerment, and Values-Based Action
When clients feel helpless, we look for small, meaningful actions aligned with their values:
Calling representatives
Volunteering
Attending community events or protests
Supporting causes they care about
Connecting with like-minded individuals
DBT reminds us that building a life worth living doesn’t require fixing everything—it requires movement toward meaning.
Even small actions can restore a sense of agency.
Routine and Self-Care as Regulation
In times of collective stress, routine becomes a stabilizing force.
We encourage:
Consistent sleep and meals
Regular movement
Time outdoors
Creative or joyful activities
Connection that feels safe and grounding
This is not indulgence—it’s nervous system maintenance.
A Reflection for Clinicians
This moment asks us to hold the dialectic clearly and intentionally.
Two things can be true:
Our clients’ emotions are valid and not every behavior that comes from them is effective.
We can acknowledge real harm and help clients stay grounded in the present.
We may feel impacted personally and our role in the room is to remain regulated and client-centered.
Our steadiness matters. Clients often borrow our nervous systems before they can access their own.
When we model boundaries, emotional regulation, and Wise Mind decision-making, we are not being neutral—we are being therapeutic.
Closing Thoughts
We don’t need to have all the answers for our clients.
What they need is a space where:
Their emotions are validated
Their boundaries are respected
Their nervous systems can settle
Their sense of agency can return
In uncertain times, therapy becomes less about solutions and more about steadiness. And that steadiness—offered consistently—can be deeply healing.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed by the current state of our country, you are not broken. You are responding to something heavy. And you don’t have to carry it alone.
